#001B5

Source
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3348385
magnum_69
ATTACHED_MALE_SEEKING_FEMALE (2) In relationship, seeking female

Age/Gender: 37M
Looks get you in the door...personality keeps you there.
205lbs
Height: 6'2"

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Jason and I grew up a poor black child. I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and kicking ass. I translate ethnic slurs for Antarctic refugees and I manage time efficiently. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. I bat .400. Children trust me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Chile, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet and I have performed open-heart surgery.

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Welcome to your therapy session.
Your therapist's name is Robonk.

Robonk:	Please tell me what's been bothering you.
you:	Looks get you in the door...personality keeps you there.
Robonk:	What are your feelings now?
you:	Let me tell you a little bit about myself.
Robonk:	What are your feelings now?
you:	My name is Jason and I grew up a poor black child.
Robonk:	I am not interested in names.
you:	I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and kicking ass.
Robonk:	Do you enjoy being a dynamic figure?
you:	I translate ethnic slurs for Antarctic refugees and I manage time efficiently.
Robonk:	Do you say you translate ethnic slurs for Antarctic refugees and you manage time efficiently for some special reason?
you:	I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes.
Robonk:	Why do you say your sensuous and godlike trombone playing?
you:	I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Robonk:	How long have you been an expert in stucco?
you:	Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants.
Robonk:	Why do you say you once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants?
you:	I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries.
Robonk:	Were you really?
you:	I enjoy urban hang gliding.
Robonk:	Do you say you enjoy urban hang gliding for some special reason?
you:	On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.
Robonk:	That's quite interesting.
you:	I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie.
Robonk:	How long have you been an abstract artist?
you:	Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear.
Robonk:	Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you?
you:	I don't perspire.
Robonk:	Don't you really perspire?
you:	I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail.
Robonk:	Is it because you are a private citizen that you came to me?
you:	I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes.
Robonk:	That's quite interesting.
you:	I bat .400.
Robonk:	Do you say you bat for some special reason?
you:	Children trust me.
Robonk:	Earlier you said your sensuous and godlike trombone playing.
you:	I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.
Robonk:	Can you elaborate on that?
you:	I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket.
Robonk:	Do you say you know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket for some special reason?
you:	I have performed several covert operations for the CIA.
Robonk:	Why do you say you have performed several covert operations for the CIA?
you:	I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair.
Robonk:	What comes to mind when you ask that?
you:	While on vacation in Chile, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.
Robonk:	What answer would please you most?
you:	I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid.
Robonk:	Your bills are all paid?
you:	Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.
Robonk:	That's quite interesting.
you:	I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin.
Robonk:	You say you have won bullfights in San Juan?
you:	I have played Hamlet and I have performed open-heart surgery.
Robonk:	Why do you say you have played Hamlet and you have performed open-heart surgery?

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